Tuesday, July 15, 2008

100th Post: A Confession

In honor of my 100th post, and the continuation of a legend, I figured I would come clean to the world.

I have a problem. I can't hide it any longer. Let me explain.

For years, man has struggled with one thing, and one thing alone: woman. Temptation, seduction, manipulation, need, love, and lust. I am only man, and I can not lie in that I too have run into a few of those problems listed.

I thought I was one of the lucky ones, that I wouldn't go through that in my lifetime. That was when I was young and naive.

Now that I have more worldly experience than most people, I can finally see what's been wrong lately. I've been blinded my my friends and family by the one thing that somehow found its way through the labyrinth that is my mind.

I have finally found what is the definition of hot. As sexy and sleek as the hips of a 1969 bright orange Dodge Charger.

It seems like lust has taken me over, and I can't feel more guilty. Not only am I drifting away from the first thing that changed my life, I'm basically only cheating myself here. It's just not right, and every man in America knows that feeling.

It's like the most beautiful woman on the planet was just dropped in my lap, and there's no way I want to let go, even though I know deep down that I should. It's the right thing to do really. I have a life that I can't just abandon for that.

With a body such a delicious shade of flawless white, accentuated by all those curves, what is a person to do but just stare half starry eyed in wonder as you walk by? God is playing a trick, it must be - how could the sight of anything invoke lust when you don't know anything else but what you saw? It's just wrong.

You know how unfair it is, really. It's just that you see something so simply gorgeous and pure and innocent that your mind instantly rearranges your priorities whether you want it to or not.

I'll change the way I think in time. I can fix myself, I know it. In the meantime, I'll have to work on being a better man, for myself, and everyone I know. I mean, really, let's be honest. Have you seen the iPhone 3G? Wow.

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