Saturday, June 28, 2008

So the local High School graduates today...

They passed classes. Most of them... and they all have cars... most of them. Unfortunately. If they could all just pull an organized pile-up, and eliminate their on-the-road status, I wouldn't mind at all. I would even accept old people.

Ever know those kinds of people that shouldn't be allowed on the roads?

First off, was some guy on his cell phone - in New York State, where it's illegal - and he decided that stop signs aren't his bag, and he would pull a Cali-Stop and roll through it. I lay on the horn and ride his bumper for the next 5 blocks.

Then there was an old geezer in a pickup truck with "for sale" signs all over it. He decided it would be great fun to do 15mph down an entire main road that runs north half way through the east side of the city. He turned off, not to bad.

My personal favorite, an arrogant teen in one of those gay street tuners. He thinks his car is hot stuff, so he revs it at a red light. The light turns green, and his car pops and sort of bounces like he forgot which was the gas pedal. Nice job kid.

The always fun, "look-at-my-Hummer-drifting-into-your-lane" was another point in my day. Good times. She got a good blast of the horn too. If I weren't driving my nice pristine 1997 Chevy S-10, I would have taken a shot at her with my door - turned her into a road smear.

Do me a favor if you have a Hummer. You know how I love them. Please - disable your airbags, ram it full speed head on into a concrete wall, and holy crap, don't brace yourself for impact. Thanks! Your busses don't need to be on the roads of Miami, they belong in a desert in the middle east. Personally, I really really really like this fun educational site that's all about the Hummer and it's... whatever it has. Shit? Fake rich kids? Bullshit? Heffer excrement? You decide, because I can't pick.

Last on that list, of course, who do I get behind on a main road heading east? That's right, Colonel Sanders and his extra crispy thigh-mobile. If I had a Subaru XT6, you can bet that wedge would have jacked his rear wheels off the ground and I would have hauled ass for him down the road.

In the words of Fake Steve Jobs (who is back by the way), I hate Frigtards. Will someone tell them to please turn in or shred their licenses, and all important legal documents declaring that they are indeed legal U.S. citizens? That would be great. Thanks.

Friday, June 27, 2008


So I just got off the phone with some guy on that Applecare help line thing, and someone named...

Ok I won't name him, but let's say his name is Bob.

He said that the iPhone 2.0 Software that comes out July 11th "should offer backup for the notes" in the form of syncing. He sounded like he was unsure of himself in telling me that, but still, he said so.

Now, my Camera will work only if I don't restore from my previous backup. Which means I have to lose all my Webclips and such... I don't know if I wanna do that. That means I have to do it all again and waste my time... Nah.

So I'll just wait until 2.0 software and continue wiping my phone when I need the camera, syncing the photos back, and then hitting that backup button.

Thanks... um, Bob. I have something new to look forward to.

iPhone 2.0 Note Sync - compliments of an Applecare help phone support random guy!

Watch no one read this, and then make a big fuss out of it when it actually comes.

You're welcome Skippy.

I know, thank you.

Sunday, June 22, 2008

I take it back

Any new pictures, aside from the one that's already there, are still the grey shadowbox thing.

So much for the quick fix... Thank you again random internet tech helpers.

This is why I'm here. I'll fix it. Like everything else.

The Big Namaste

All is well in the iUniverse.

That little trick in the previous post worked out.

I think until the 2.0 software comes out, I'll be leaving at least one photo in the Camera Roll so iPhone doesn't forget how to work itself.

Thank you random helpful internet people. Check is in the mail. Ok, not really.

I loves me some technology.

iPhone Camera Glitch

So, I go to use my iPhone's camera yesterday, and I'm hit with a snag.

The little bastard thinks that games are fun, and Vista-like simpleton problems are funny to the user.


They piss the user off, and the user then want's to turn the user's iPhone into an iFrisbee into the user's living room wall.

I may have found a solution, right here, that fixes it. We shall see. I'm restoring it as I share these life changing secrets with you now.

I'll report back here for duty and let all of you - my readers - my friends - know how it worked, or if it even worked, or if my iPhone is a steamy little pile of used parts on my floor.

Any way this goes, I'm waking up to scrambled eggs and salsa tomorrow morning. It will be a good morning. I just feel it.

How good? As good as Dale Jr's Michigan win. As good as July 11th will be with the 3G iPhone's launch. As good as an end-of-the-day Wal*Mart cinnamon roll on discount because no one else wants it.

I love cheap things.

Like politics!

Tuesday, June 17, 2008


He finally won an actual points event!

Now, after he finally wins, just like I've said, people think it wasn't fair that he passed the pace car.

Well you know what's cool?

You can gripe all you want but it won't change the outcome.

Dale won it on father's day, after his 76 race winless streak. His father Dale Sr won 76 career races. He won it at Michigan, where he ran a cream colored retro #8 in tribute to his Dale Sr and his grandfather Ralph. A few little coincidences? Not sure.

Fuck the pace car. Anyone can pass it for a few seconds and not get shot in the face. Stop griping because your favorite driver's didn't win or lost out at the last second. It's all about strategy, and obviously at Michigan your driver didn't have it.

The #88 Amp car finally got a points win. Amen.

He's third in standings - let's see where this leads. Rock on.

Thursday, June 12, 2008


So. I went into a deep seclusion for the past few days, I mean after all, how am I supposed to feel after misinforming you about WWDC and the great things that you'll experience?

You'll see the new iPhone - Check - iPhone 3G
You'll see a device revised - Check - iPhone 3G, duh
You'll see a new networking and online solutions tool - Check - Mobile Me
You may see a short demo of something big to come later - Check - Snow Leopard
You'll see an entirely new device - WRONG - DAMN IT TO HELL

Where was it Steve? You left it out! Just as you cut out It's A Small World as your hellistic plot bent on world domination was playing with the 70 red lucky iPhone receiving countries.

I'm not at liberty to discuss this, but I'm gonna have to get to the bottom of this. I don't know...

Somehow it looks like my weekend is shot to hell as I try to hunt down some important business-like men for my own personal benefit. I have to hunt them down like a Civic driver so I can get up underneath them and turn them into the rail on the highway. Damn it.

In the words of Kurt Donald Cobain, "I hate myself and want to die"...

No I'm kidding, people are way too fun, and useable.

Google Search, here I come.

Monday, June 9, 2008

Just 3 Hours Left

Steve Jobs is going to give the world more gifts with thanks to my favorite little Cupertino company.

In honor of the occasion, I decided to add on another feature to my blog. Just scroll over any link like this Google one and SnapShots will offer a preview of whatever you plan to click away on before you go to that page.

We'll see how I like it. Not sure about it yet really. It's all about the user experience though, right?

I'm kidding, I'll see what I think about it.

I need to go rest up, fellow Bloggees... Blogists? Bloggers.

I'll see you after the Stevenote. Maybe on my new iTablet? Who knows? Well, ok Steve does, but I don't get to talk to him all too often of course. He's a busy man you know. Almost as busy as Mel Gibson - who, by the way, will tell you so himself.

I really hope he has nothing to do with the Guitars...

Sunday, June 8, 2008



10:00 AM Cali-time, 1:00 PM New Yorker-time.

Am I the only person on this planet that's looked forward to it since last years?

I have a feeling this is gonna be awesome.

Not only that. I'm Skippy. Let me explain...


You'll see the new iPhone, you'll see an entirely new device, you'll see a device revised, you'll see a new networking and online solutions tool, and you may see a short demo of something big to come later.

Skippy said so.


We'll see.

I had no idea that SteveNote was an actual slang term. I just started it saying a couple days ago. Awesome.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Snow Leopard?

So, my take on this sick little "Snow Leopard" OS rumor that's been floating around.

I actually think it's a possibility. As posted in response to a user on MacRumors, I side with the following.

Mac OS 10.6 may implement most of the actual OS 10.5 for a smaller fully Touch mobile device, such as the rumored "iTablet".

This would also make sense in like with those Intel only rumors, in the way that you wouldn't need or want to run it on any other device.

Why run an OS that's only made for one Touch device on anything else, and why keep PPC support if it's not used anywhere on said device?

I say bring it on. Give me my MacTouch, and iMac screen desktop dock. I have the Platinum MasterCard ready. Let's roll, Steve.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

The Flying Doorstop

This car.

Is a great car.

Have you ever been in it or driven it? Then do it.

It's a Subaru XT, made in the late 80's and early 90's, and it is good.

This thing is one bigass wedge. Can you guess how aerodynamic it is? The gas cap and door handles are all perfectly flush with the body.

Yeah. It's that good.

I know someone with an 89 XT6, and that car is the king of the city. All these little kids with their Civics and Mustangs think they have everything in a car.


No they don't. This Subaru can trump any of these cars with sails on the trunk and plastic body kits that change the car beyond recognition.

Well. I may be on to something here. I may be close to a Subaru XT Turbo. Not as good as the XT6, but if you can't beat something, you best try to get on the same level.

Skippy may be going on tour.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008


No. I'm not giving away iPod Touches to every 10th visitor.

I would of course keep one and sell the rest on eBay for you.

When I say for you I mean to benefit this blog.

When I say benefit this blog I mean enhance my life with a BMW M5 and then explain all of it's wonderful features on here.

Well. Today's news.

Apple just launched their student promotion for this Summer. The deal is, buy a Mac - excluding the Mini - and you get a FREE iPod Touch or iPod Nano.

Yeah, I would sure go for that $200 Nano when I could get and sell the Touch for $300, buy a Nano and have $$ left over. That's a slick little promotion they have going there.

I think... This is officially... The Summer of Macs.

I think I should get iBook and iPhone brothers.

Monday, June 2, 2008

Peace from Wherever

Who the hell knows where I am.

I'm off on vacation, and in a few short words.

It. Is. Good.

Where did the money come from to do this?

Who knows.

Why did I do this?

Who cares.

You know what all of America needs to do? Leave. That's right. Everyone in North America need to leave the continent for 24 hours. Come back and see where things are. The price of everything from gas to eggs to power scooters will have dropped 80%, and the government may be in turmoil, but that's ok.

It's just a damn good reason to get away from it all. Literally.

You know what else everyone needs to do?

Set their watches.

Know why?

Well. One simple reason. It's vacation. It's Miller time.